Looking for a CHARITY to support? Try POPUP

It’s very rare to find a Charity Organization that focuses on every aspect of a person’s life, from their emotional status and daily needs, all the way through to up-skilling and training them.

POPUP (People Upliftment Programme) is a non-profit organisation with a holistic approach to the upliftment of under-privileged communities thereby ensuring that all the needs of individuals are addressed – mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually. POPUP renders services to all persons living in Tshwane (in the Gauteng province, South Africa) and the surrounding areas regardless of race, culture, gender or religion. Currently POPUP’s main centre is situated in Salvokop, Pretoria. POPUP also expanded with a second centre in Soshanguve

 

POPUP has amazing ways of helping the underprivileged, they comprise of:

• A Soup Kitchen
• A Free Clothing Store
• A Daycare centre
• A Food programme
• Food parcels
• Counselling
• Skills development & Training
• Job creation & placement
• Medical, Dental & Eye-care services

Should you wish to get involved you can volunteer in one of the categories, you could donate money to their organization, or you could download their ‘needs list’ and donate some of the items on their list.

They host a POPUP Market, where the proceeds benefit the entrepreneur exhibiting his / her products at their premises. They truly believe in enriching lives, enriching communities.

For more info on this amazing Charity Organization, visit their website here

If you want to make a donation, you can do so into their banking account

POPUP BANKING DETAILS:

Name of account: POPUP

Name of bank: ABSA

Branch name: Hatfield

Type of account: Current cheque account

Account number: 4050 663 335

Branch code: 335-545

Reference: Own details

Remember, we all can make a difference in someone’s life, even if it’s by donating to organizations like POPUP, and enabling them, through your donation, to change the life of the people they reach.

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Pregnant & Breastfeeding Moms: TRY THIS Delicious Mom2Be Shake

Pregnant and breastfeeding moms … are you looking for an alternative to swallowing those nasty vitamin pills every day?

 

Yes we know it’s good for you and your baby …. blah blah blah …. But sometimes it’s just nasty having to slug down a handful of pills, and you just wish there was another option to give your baby the nutrients s/he needs in a great tasting way.

 

Well this Mommy has a solution! It’s called Mom2Be®, and it was a LIFE SAVER for me when I was pregnant and breastfeeding, especially when I was wishing for CHOCOLATE because it comes in this AMAZING chocolate flavour.

Okay okay …. So you want the info already? Let me get straight to it ….

 

Mom2Be® has a SHAKE ….. mmmmm ….. it can be taken with water for those who don’t want to consume milk, OR it can be taken as a proper MILK SHAKE. I’m a milk lover, so for me I would mix the powder with some milk and ice-cubes. Shake it up, and sit and sip away. QUICK, FAST AND SIMPLE.

 

It is packed FULL of the vitamins you need during pregnancy and beyond, and is actually a great option to take from the time you are trying to conceive (especially because of the Folic Acid it contains).

 

It comes in 3 amazing flavours: Vanilla, Strawberry and Chocolate!

 

Pregnant and Nauseous?

 

The Mom2B® Shakes have vitamin B6, which is known to help ease Nausea during pregnancy.

My FAVORITE FLAVOR when I was pregnant was Strawberry!! What I loved was on days when I just didn’t feel I could stomach enough nutritious food, I knew that by drinking my Mom2Be® Shake, I was at least giving my baby the nutrients he needed, and the best part is they are low in fat!!!! We all know, it’s so tough trying to make sure we get enough nutrients, without adding unnecessary centimetres to our ever growing waistline, with the Mom2Be® Shake this isn’t even a concern.

 

When you are in a rush, you just put 3 scoops in some milk or water, and shake away!

 

But when you have some extra time, here are two RECIPES I loved to use …. It just requires the blender to do all the work … easy peezy!

 

Mom2Be® Banana Smoothie Recipe:

 

Ingredients:

3 Scoops of Mom2Be® Shake Vanilla

250ml Full Cream Milk / Water

1 banana

Ice Cubes

 

Method:

Throw all in the blender, and let it blend away. Pour in your favourite glass and relax and sip away.

Mom2Be® Strawberry Smoothie Recipe:

 

Ingredients:

3 Scoops of Mom2Be® Shake Strawberry

250ml Full Cream Milk / Water

A handful of strawberries

Ice cubes

 

Method:

Throw all in the blender, and let it blend away. Pour in your favourite glass and relax and sip away.

 

So to my fellow Mommies …. Cheers to new ways of giving our babies the nutrients they need with Mom2Be®

 

For more info on Mom2Be® visit their website here

Find them on facebook here

And look out for them in Dischem and independent Pharmacies all over South Africa.

They also have other amazing products like a Pregnancy Omega supplement (that doesn’t taste like fish), and a Pregnancy multivitamin supplement that has all the nutrients you need when pregnant or trying to conceive.

Starbucks is HERE and this is what it COSTS

Starbucks, the global coffee giant, has officially opened its doors to here in South Africa at the corner of Tyrwhitt and Cradock Avenues in Rosebank, with a second branch due to open at the end of April, at the Mall of Africa.

Twitter has been a buzz all morning, with people talking about the queues to get inside, as well as the insane pricing of R250 for a South African Starbucks collector’s mug.

Starbucks have revealed its much anticipated pricing structure. Along with an array of coffees, the stores will serve pastries and cakes.

The coffees will come in three sizes:  Tall, Grande, and Venti.

Coffee	Tall	Grande	Venti
Filter	R17	R20	R23
Caffè Latte	R27	R30	R33
Cappuccino	R27	R30	R33
Caffè Americano	R22	R24	R28
Caramel Macchiato	R32	R35	R38
Espresso	R17	R20	–

Listed company, Taste Holdings, announced in July 2015 that it had secured the rights to open full-format Starbucks stores in South Africa.

According to Taste, following the grand opening, 12 to 15 more stores will open over the next two years at a cost of R108 million.

The group expects future store growth of 20 outlets per year.

Taste’s research into the market opportunity for the brand – taking costs into account – is for 150 to 200 stores in South Africa.

 

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Babies with REFLUX, and how you can HELP them!

This Guest post is written by Dr Mike Marinus who is a Chiropractor, specialising in Colic & Reflux in Babies

 

Babies are amazing… but they have a tendency to leak. This happens mostly because of the vast amounts of milk it takes to sustain a body which is growing more rapidly than any other mammal of the same age. If you want to get an idea of just how much milk our babies are taking in during this period, you would have to drink about 14 litres of milk a day and then spend 20 plus hours of that day on your back and a few crammed into a car chair. You can imagine that under these circumstances, reflux would probably be a big part of your life too.

 

Babies tummies are very stretchy, but even they have limits and when babies take in too much milk at once the valve on top of the stomach loses its grip and the stomach contents make their way back up the oesophagus and possibly out of the mouth. Actually throwing up is only one form of reflux, you also get silent reflux which is when the stomach contents make their way up the oesophagus but not out of the mouth. These babies can be tricky to diagnose because there is no spit up. All they may have is a cough, lots of throat clearing and be upset when you put them down directly after a meal.

 

Speaking of diagnosing babies with reflux, it is important to realize that reflux is normal. It is not a disease process of any kind although It can, however, become complicated when either your baby is throwing up so much that weight gain or even dehydration become issues or if stomach acid begins to track up into the oesophagus, causing burning and discomfort. These are scenarios where you should be speaking to your GP or Paediatrician about how to manage your child’s condition and looking into strategies to alleviate your child’s symptoms.

 

Premmy babies and reflux go hand in hand. This has a lot to do with the fact that their valves are underdeveloped and pop open more easily than most. Add to this the fact they they are playing catch up with their weight gain and relatively taking in massive amounts of food that the tiny valve cannot hope to keep down. Premmy’s also generally have a period in NICU where they are fed through a Nasogastric tube that goes down the oesophagus and into the stomach. This is an amazing solution for babies who cannot yet latch and feed properly but it is terrible for the immature valve that is constantly forced open by the tube. Lastly, premmy babies spend heaps of time on their backs (especially in NICU) which of course means that gravity can’t help in keeping food down… and so up it comes.

What can you do to help them?

Body positioning is the key to dealing with these bubs. Feeding them with head above feet is imperative to let gravity help keep the milk down. If mom has a fast let-down reflex it can lead to baby gulping at food which is a great way to fill the stomach with air which adds to the pressure on the valve. If you have a fast let-down try feeding leaning slightly back or even lying flat with baby on your chest. These little ones need to be upright for around 30 minutes after each feed to allow the milk time to move into the intestines before they are put down to sleep. Research shows us that sleeping on the left hand side empties their tummies up to 60% faster than lying on their backs or right hand side.

 

Lastly, keep in mind that reflux is not the only reason a baby might be throwing up. There are a few nasties which need to be ruled out if your baby is projectile vomiting, has a fever along with the vomiting or is not gaining weight. Make sure you check with your health care provider to make sure you know what it is you are dealing with when it comes to babies and reflux.

Dr Mike Marinus (M.Tech Chiro), is a Dad to his two beautiful children and a Chiropractor in Blairgowrie, Johannesburg, with a special interest in family practice and paediatric care. Click here to hear his Podcast and here to watch his YouTube Video on burping babies.

Should you wish to contact his practices, you can get all his information here. He is known in mommy circles as the “baby whisperer”, and he certainly deserves the title! When baby is happy, mommy is happy!

MUST ask DAYCARE questions to protect your BABY

 

With many moms needing to go back to work straight after their 4 months of maternity leave, it is vital we ensure our babies are in safe and sound hands. Here are some essential questions you need to ask a potential day-care when considering leaving your baby there.

 

What are their Day-care Qualifications?

It’s important to establish whether the day-care have qualifications in caring for infants. Also whether they are trained in things like CPR for infants and ways to stimulate their growing minds and bodies.

 

What is the Staff to Child Ratio?

It is vitally important for there to be a good staff to child ratio when you are entrusting someone with babies between the ages of 3 – 18 months. Babies take up a lot of time and attention, and you don’t want there to be 1 caregiver for every 8 babies for example. A good ratio would be 1 caregiver for every 3 babies.

 

What are their security measures?

It is important that they have basic security, like lockable gates and doors. They also need to have measures in place to ensure the correct person is collecting your child. Most day-care’s ask for the Identity numbers of the parents that will collect the babies. If the parents cannot collect their babies for any given reason, they need to email a copy of the ID Document of the person who is collecting the baby that day, so they can ensure the correct person is fetching your child.

 

How do they handle sick babies?

Is there is a clear plan for responding to illness, including how to decide whether a baby needs to go home? Are babies asked to stay home if they’re sick? Will you be charged for days you need to keep your little one at home? Will they administer medication prescribed by a doctor on your behalf if your baby is in their care? It’s important you know their policy on this, as you will need to have a plan on who will stay home with your baby if they are sick and cannot attend day-care.

 

Are there activities they do for the babies? Do they go outdoors?

A good Day-care will not just let your baby lay in a cot all day or sit in the floor. They will do activities with them like read to them, play Mozart music and let them be on yoga balls to build their core muscles to prepare them for crawling. It’s also not good if your baby is never taken outdoors. Vitamin D from the Sun, is vital for their development. They should be allowed to sit or lay outside in a shaded area whilst being monitored by a caregiver.

 

How do they ensure the facility is clean and organized?

You will need to know details of how they keep the cot mattresses clean, or the baby changing mats where they change diapers. How often are these things disinfected? It should be after every nappy change.

 

Does your baby fit into their schedule or do they follow your baby’s schedule?

Some Day-care’s want to specify what times your baby is to be fed or what time they should sleep. This poses a problem if your new born was home with you for the first 3 months and you had your own schedule different to theirs. You will find in these instances your baby will get frustrated suddenly going into a foreign environment and not being allowed to follow the schedule they are comfortable with. A good day-care has enough teachers or caregivers to enable you to tell them your babies schedule and preferences, and for them to allow your baby the freedom to continue in the pattern that makes them happy.

 

What are their operating hours and what happens if you are late?

If you are working, and you could arrive late due to traffic problems you need to be assured someone dependable and reliable will still be caring for your baby if you are late. Most day-cares will charge you a fee for fetching your baby late, as they need to pay the teachers or caregivers overtime. You rather pay the fee than be worried who your baby will be left with.

 

HELPFUL TIP: Go to the Day-care un-announced during the day and ask for a walk through. Don’t let them know you are coming. This way you can see what they get up to when they aren’t expecting anyone to come. A Day-care that isn’t comfortable with you popping in for a tour is already questionable. When you are there, take a look around, and also look at the babies that are there. Do they look calm and relaxed or are they all screaming and looking miserable? You want your baby to be in a calm, relaxed, safe environment.

 

Remember you want to have peace of mind when you return to work. So try to ask as many questions as possible to give you peace of mind.

How to teach your CHILD about MONEY and CREDIT

Assuming that children don’t need to know about finances until they are actually earning money is a big mistake. Finances are such a big part of everyday life and good financial habits will benefit your children for the rest of their lives. An essential aspect of this is the importance of credit and how it can work for or against them.

“Most people will need credit at some stage in their lives and it is important for parents to teach their kids to understand the basics behind how credit works to equip them with good money making decisions,” says Chris Labuschagne, CEO of FNB Credit Card.

Credit is a tricky concept, especially when it comes to compound interest. But this shouldn’t be a deterrent as there are ways of demonstrating the power of credit and interest through practical examples.

Demonstrating what credit is

“The very first port of call is to explain what credit is,” says Labuschagne. “The easiest way to start the conversation is to show them a credit card, as this is the most visible form of credit, and they have probably seen you take it out your wallet.”

Explain to them that the money in this card doesn’t actually belong to you, but it is a loan. You borrow it from the bank.

“To make credit more real, walk around your house and make your children guess which items where bought on credit,” says Labuschagne. “At the same time you can explain which ones you still owe money on, or those that you paid off. Make them understand that credit is very important because without it you wouldn’t be living in your house and driving your car every day.”

The next step is to teach them the difference between good credit, which is credit to build your wealth and bad credit.

“Demonstrate that good credit is funding assets that improve your life, such as your home or studies to get work, while bad credit is funding luxuries or cool stuff because you can’t afford them,” says Labuschagne.

Understanding interest

“The main concept to explain and make your kids understand is that of interest,” says Labuschagne. “It is quite complicated, so you will need to break it down simply but, basically, show that they will be paying more for something that isn’t always necessary.”

Make real life examples to teach your kids. Find an item that they really want, such as a new phone and research how much it costs. If it costs for example R2000, with a pen and paper add up the months it would take them to save for this item out of their pocket money.

If they don’t earn pocket money, and you would usually buy items for them, for this exercise allocate a set amount of money for them each month, say R200.

Then explain that you will lend them the money. Very broadly add on 20% to the item and ask if they would be willing to pay R2400 for the exact same phone. Work out how many more months it will take them to pay for it.

“You don’t need to go into detail of how interest works, just show simply that they will be paying more for the same item,” says Labuschagne.

This would be a good time to show how interest can work in their favour as well. If they put their money into a savings account, they will have not only R2000 to pay for their phone, but also a bit more to spend on something else that they like.

The importance of budgeting

“Budgeting is a big part of all finances and now is the perfect time to show why a budget is so important,” says Labuschagne.

If they get a set amount of pocket money they need to know that they won’t get any more money, even if they are paying off their phone.

“Ask them how much money they need for say, airtime, a month and what about other things they use their pocket money for. It will soon become apparent that spending all their money on the new item isn’t not going to get them very far if they can’t afford money for other items,” says Labuschagne.

Being responsible

“Part of teaching your kid about being financially smart, is to teach them about their responsibilities when it comes to repayments,” says Labuschagne.

Again you can explain fairly simply with an example. If they have borrowed money from you to pay for the phone and don’t pay it back, it doesn’t mean that they stop owing you money.

Explain that it is the same when you borrow money from a bank to pay for items, you need to pay it back responsibly and that is why it is always important to not borrow more then you can afford.

“The most important tool in managing credit is learning discipline and being able to delay gratification. Parents are also responsible for setting a good example as this is an important part of learning,” concludes Labuschagne.

Article courtesy of SA Good News

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Whats for Dinner? – Smoky Lamb comfort food

Wondering what to make for dinner tonight? Why not try this DELICIOUS Smoky Lamb stew. Quick, easy and delicious

Ingredients

• flour (season with salt & pepper)
• 1kg lamb knuckles / necks
• olive oil
• 2 large onions, chopped
• 3 large carrots, roughly sliced
• 5 celery sticks, roughly sliced
• 2 heaped teaspoons of crushed garlic
• 15ml (3tsp) smoked paprika
• 2 bay leaves
• 250ml beef stock
• 1 x 440g bottle of Woolworths Mild Pepperdew Chutney
• 1 x 410g can of Woolworths chopped Tomatoe & Herb mix
• salt (to your taste)
• freshly ground black pepper (to your taste)
• dried red chilli flakes (to your taste)

Chefs hint: If you cannot find the Woolworths ingredients mentioned, then just use 2 x cans of chopped tomatoes, and add to that a few finely chopped Pepperdews (about 4 or 5), a 1/4 teaspoon of dried Oregano, a 1/4 teaspoon of dried Basil, and a 1/4 teaspoon of dried Thyme

Method

1. Dredge the meat in the seasoned flour and shake the excess off. Make sure the meat is dry before dredging it in the flour. If you have just washed it, then pat it dry with a paper kitchen towel.
2. Lightly brown the meat in batches in the oil and set aside.
3. Heat some oil in a large saucepan, add the vegetables, garlic, bay leaves & smoked paprika and sauté the vegetables until the carrots are starting to soften.
4. Add the meat, the stock, the canned tomatoes& the Pepperdew chutney.
5. Bring to a boil, reduce the heat to the lowest temperature, cover and simmer for about 90 minutes or until very tender.
6. During the cooking time, you need to check in once in a while that it is not burning, and add a little water if necessary.
7. If the sauce is still too liquid at the end of the cooking time, increase the heat and allow to bubble rapidly without a lid on until the sauce is reduced and thickens.

Serve with some creamy mashed potatoes

Serves 4 – 6

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20 Brilliant first time Parent tips

Being a new parent can be overwhelming. Here are a few tips to help you get through those first few months:

1. Decide before baby is born how you will manage sleep shifts. If your wife is breastfeeding she can express milk and you can do the midnight shift. Or if baby is being bottle fed then one night can be mom and the next night dad.

2. Go out to dinner and to the movies before baby comes. Once baby comes take time out by asking someone just to baby sit, even if it’s for 2 hours. It will rejuvenate you and you can then give your baby the best of you.

3. Your baby is a unique individual. Take time paying attention to their likes and dislikes. As each week passes you will learn new aspects of their personality.

4. Nothing can prepare you for having poo on your hands or vomit in your mouth. You will be shocked how quickly and easily you adapt.

5. Sleep deprivation is no joke. Decide beforehand that no matter what your spouse says or does you will forgive and forget immediately. You can say and do the most horrific things when you are tired.

6. Your baby will change every week and you will see major changes at each milestone like longer sleeps at 8 weeks and then again at 3 months. Hang in there it does get easier and more enjoyable.

7. Your love for the baby grows with each day. When you think you love them you discover you love them more. You can’t spoil your baby by loving them and cuddling them. What you are teaching them is that there is someone around when they are in need.

8. Be patient with your wife if she isn’t ready to have sex immediately. Her body has gone through immense changes. Love her patiently. Show her affection until she is ready to have sex again. She desperately needs that love and affection from you.

9. Your friends without children will be annoyed because all you do is talk about your baby and send them pics of your baby. Be patient with them. It’s new to them too.

10. Your own parents need to grow into their role as grandparents. Be patient with them. They too need to adjust and learn to follow the new boundaries you will set. They also need time to love and bond with your baby.

11. Take a ‘babymoon’. Limit visitors for the first few weeks or first 3 months. This gives you space to adapt to your new life. It also takes the pressure off having to clean the house or entertain.

12. It’s almost impossible to hold a conversation with your spouse. Between sleep deprivation and the baby constantly needing you there is no time. Just know it gets better and your bond will resume as baby grows.

13. You may feel that you’re living through one long day. In the first few weeks you feed baby, burp baby, change baby, put baby to sleep. Follow cycle. Hour after hour. Days turn into weeks. It does get better.

14. You will drink cold tea and eat cold food. You not alone. If you can warm your spouses food do so. Even ten times over. Warm food becomes a treat.

15. A washing machine is a blessing. Some days you will do one load after another. Also the noise is an amazing way to put your baby to sleep. It’s called white noise. Babies love it.

16. Team work is key.Try be organised. Get a rhythm going. If you are bottle feeding then always have a kettle filled with boiled water or a flask filled with boiled water. If you feeding baby, then your spouse should be washing bottles etc.

17. You will suddenly tell your spouse you need the toilet just to have a break. Don’t feel bad. Sit there and take your breather. When you go back give your baby the best of you again.

18. TV? What’s that? You won’t have time to watch TV. But don’t stress it does get better.

19. Your house will have baby stuff everywhere. As the months go you can tidy up and find place for everything. But in the first few weeks don’t stress to frantically clean or organise the things. Your baby needs you s/he is adjusting to the new world. Just focus on that. It’s hard enough.

20. Just remember you will eventually sleep longer. You will understand your baby more, and you will find your own rhythm in your new family unit. Ask for help if you feel overwhelmed! It doesn’t make you a bad parent.

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Marriage: Back to Basics – Guest Post

When I consider being married to such a precious woman (note I wrote precious and not perfect), a grin seems to appear on my face.

Let me explain: When listening to stories from other married couples it is clear that women are a special kind of their own…The easiest to love, yet the the most difficult… and I know that I am not alone in my thinking.

Will we men never completely understand our wives?

I thought I did – a good couple of times actually… but she consistently proved me wrong. However, this is all part of the wild and wonderful adventure of marriage for which I am so grateful and I have concluded that I was not meant to understand her but to love her.

This I can do!

I love my wife and I love to tell her that. It is very important to me that she knows just how much I love her. If my wife doesn’t feel the love I professed to her before and on our wedding day then what kind of a marriage am I cultivating? The very reason we got married was because we loved each other.

My goal is to be true to the promise I made to my wife on our wedding day. That is to love and cherish her for as long as we both shall live! Call me old school, but the truth is that I had found the partner that I wanted to spend my life with – the rest of my life…so I am quite content to give her my all, to openly pour out my heart to her and let her know it.

I don’t mind being totally honest with her. It creates such a freedom in our marriage.
She is my soul mate and to not be true to her is to not be true to myself. So who would I be kidding?

So in many instances I don’t mind being the first one to say “I’m sorry” – even when I am not at fault. For I’ve had to learn that to pursue an argument is to invite strife into our marriage. I’d rather answer gently and keep us in a state of steady communication.
This means more to me than lording authority that I might not even truly have, over her. (An argument often leads to destructive dialogue and in that moment authority can turn into abuse – verbal or physical. I prefer to take the lead and pursue peace while attempting to get my message across), and I have had the pleasure of eating the fruit of these sometimes faith-filled actions.

I have also learned that I cannot expect the same response from my emotion- filled wife (most wives are). The truth is that in the instance of heated disagreements I have to make a conscious decision not to be a destructive party to my own marriage. Having practiced this principle, my wife has sometimes suprised me by being the one to respond gently (we husbands are also not perfect). These times have always humbled me as it showed that she had been aware of my example.

This brings me to a next point:

Nothing makes me happier than her acknowledging me.
She is my wife and her opinion of me is always the highest in ranks of opinions to me simply because she knows me – with all my faults and shortcomings. (It’s sometimes easy to pull wool over peoples eyes but you can’t do this to your wife – she knows you man!)
Wives, we may not always show you, but your opinion always matters, so be gentle and wise when speaking to us. No husband wants to look “silly” especially in front of his wife and no wife should ever make her husband feel less than a man to another man (Wives please take note of this). We trust you as our wives.

What I want to achieve in my marriage is for Love to truly be the foundation of everything I do for my wife.
Husbands, I do believe that when we treat our wives the way we promised when we committed ourselves to her – with unrestrained love everyday which is what our wives need, they will automatically respond with the respect and honour that we need, ultimately leading to a very happy and fulfilled marriage and home.
It has been said that a woman who feels loved has no problem with submitting to her husband.

To conclude, husbands let’s make sure that we are continually cultivating an atmosphere of love that is patient and kind and not proud, boastful or rude – this I believe is the foundation of a prosperous, marriage.

This guest post was written by Marvin Maddocks. Marvin is the loving husband to Stacy and their three beautiful children.

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Etiquette for new GRANDMOTHERS to their daughters or daughter in laws

In today’s modern society, life is so different to how it was 30 years ago. In a few short decades parenting styles have changed and the family unit looks completely different. With this in mind I’ve noticed that our parents now struggle with this new family dynamic when it comes to them being grandparents. I’ve chatted to a few woman and these are their words of advice on what modern day parents need from their parents (their children’s grandparents)

Don’t force your way into the delivery room
Many grandmothers want to be in the delivery room when their daughters give birth. Perhaps 30 years ago when new fathers were not allowed in the delivery room this might have been helpful. But these days modern dad’s want to be there to share this special moment with their wives. Don’t force your way in. If your daughter invites you of her own accord then leap to the task. If not, be happy that she is married to a man who wants to be there in this life changing moment. This is their family moment which they might want to share privately. Respect that.

Father’s want to be more involved in parenting, let them
Modern day Fathers want to really parent. They want to feed their babies and change them and be involved in the decisions around parenting. Allow them this space. Encourage them to get involved, don’t try force your way in on things they want to do. If they holding and feeding the baby don’t sulk because you feel you aren’t getting a chance. Instead rejoice that your grandchild is blessed with a dad who is present. In a society with many absent fathers, it’s important we encourage fathers who want to be present and involved.

Cook meals for the first few weeks
One way to truly be a blessing is to give this new family unit some of your delicious home cooked meals to take the pressure off them in the first few weeks of parenting. Trust me the comfort of their mothers cooking will be greatly appreciated.

No breastfeeding shaming
I’ve heard many stories of how mothers 30 years ago were forced to breastfeed their babies. Yes we know that breastfeeding is what’s best for babies, but not all mothers can breastfeed for various reasons. Whether your daughter or daughter in law just chooses not to breastfeed, or doesn’t do it for legitimate medical reasons, don’t shame them with stories about how breastfeeding is best. Support them in their choice to formula feed and help them on their journey to find the best formula for their babies. Also know the facts so you don’t tell them things that are false like “breastfed babies never get sick or get colic, only formula fed babies do.” That’s false and can cause unnecessary stress on a new mother.

Educate yourself on new research and new parenting styles
There is so much new information around and so much new research on how to bring up your child. Read up on these things. Educate yourself on over stimulation, sleep training, colic etc. Trust me you will learn something new.

Give your children space to parent their way
Not because you did something with your children means there isn’t a better way to do something. If your children choose new methods support them. Don’t tell them it won’t work. I’m sure when you were a first time parent you also wanted to try new ways to take care of your baby. Find out what they trying and find a way to help them in it. They will really appreciate it.

Don’t guilt trip them if they don’t do what you think is best
Unless they are doing something that is causing detramental harm to their new born baby that requires you to step in … Don’t. Give them space and don’t constantly make snide remarks regarding how you disagree. Don’t make them feel guilty for “disobeying you.” Rather support them and understand why they choose to do things that way.

Stop guilt tripping working moms
Not all moms can be stay at home moms. Whether they wish to or not. It’s not always possible. Sometimes it’s best for the family unit for the mom to work. Yes this means they will entrust the rearing of their baby to a daycare or a stranger. That’s ok. These days daycares have amazing educational programmes that actually will greatly benefit your grandchild. Don’t stress a new mom out with your concerns. She is concerned already. Rather comfort her and tell her your grandchild will be in great hands and support her decision to work if she so chooses.

Remember these are the views and feelings of mom’s I’ve spoken to. All family units are different. Spend time finding out what your children need from you as a grandparent. As long as you offer love and support you are doing an amazing job.

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